Dreams June 2003

"Talking to a Potential Stalker"    06/27/03 My mother yelled to me that there was someone on the phone for me, so I picked it up in my room.  I turned out to be a man in his 50s whose voice sounded a little bit like one of my father's friends.  I politely chatted for a while, but after hanging up the same man began to IM me on my computer.  He told me that he had two kids named Jordana and Jarrad and that he enjoyed traveling the world.  It seemed like maybe he was asking me to travel with him or to date him.  But I realized that I didn't actually know who he was or why he was calling me, so I signed off and went to ask my parents.  First I asked my mother who had called and she said she didn't know.  Then I asked my father if he knew.  He said he had no idea and began criticizing me for giving out my personal information to a man I didn't know.  My father implied that this man could be a stalker.  So then I went to class and realized that I had spent so much time talking to the mystery man that I hadn't done my homework.  I was worried that my teacher would be angry and I was also worried that somehow the mystery man would know where my class was and come meet me. "Smoking More Menthol Cigarettes"    06/22/03 I was staying at my grandmother's house for a short vacation along with my mother and brother.  Ms. Dale was also there, but I watched her take of the baby T-shirt she was wearing and give it to my mother to try on.  I thought that was really weird because my mother definitely wouldn't fit in such a shirt.  I left them and went to hang out with one of my friends.  She was sitting on the ground with a  carton of menthol cigarettes beside her, however, the cigarettes were just loose and not in packs.  She was already smoking and invited me to join her.  I asked her if I could have a cigarette and she gladly handed one over and held out her lighter to light the cigarette for me.  We chatted and we smoked.  The experience was extremely enjoyable, but by the end I realized that I had smoked close to what would be a pack of cigarettes.  I told my friend that I would only smoke one more and then stop for the day.  Then I said that I would only smoke in the future when I was with someone else who was smoking, but I realized that I would become a complete mooch if I did that.  My friend encouraged me to go to the store and buy menthol lights.  Her suggestion made me feel like I could actually go to the store and buy cigarettes without feeling awkward or unsure.  I decided that I really liked hanging out with her and that we should do it again in the future. "Love Hotel Vacation"    06/20/03 Jillian and I were on vacation together.  I had planned the vacation for myself, but I didn't want to go alone, so I invited her to come with me.  When we arrived at our destination, which was somewhere in Japan, we checked into the hotel, which turned out to be a "love hotel".  We soon discovered that the owner of the hotel was Hispanic, not Japanese.  I began to think the hotel was actually in Mexico, especially when I noticed that just outside the lobby there appeared to be a stable with at least one horse.  I had been worried because I do not speak Japanese and thought I wouldn't be able to communicate enough to check in, but I was able to speak to the owner in both English and Spanish pretty easily.  The owner suggested restaurants where we could eat dinner and explained the rules about checking in and checking out.  He told us that we were allowed to leave our room and come back later, something that hotels of this type usually didn't allow, but we had to phone the front desk before and after doing so.  Jillian and I went to our room which looked strangely like a room at the Holiday Inn or any other American hotel.  However, there were piles of folded sheets which had not been put on the beds yet.  Jillian said she would start making the beds while I went downstairs to talk to the owner.  If we were going to stay in a love hotel, then I at least wanted to stay in an authentic room rather than one that looked like any other regular hotel room.  The owner apologized to me and said he didn't know that I wanted to stay in one of the "special" rooms.  He gave me the key to one of the special rooms and I returned to Jillian.  She had completely made her bed and asked me if I wanted help making mine.  I told her no and said that I wasn't going to make my bed because we were transferring to another room.  She said that she thought the room that we were in was ok, but if we were going to transfer that I should at least have the decency to make the bed for the next person who would have the room we were currently in.  I reluctantly made the bed, although she ended up helping me because the sheets were very small and very difficult to properly fit to the mattress.  Finally, the bed was made and we went to our new room.  I had been worried about finding the new room, but it turned out to be very easy to find because it was the only room where the number on the door was flashing.  We opened the door and went inside.  This room looked much more modern and I liked it a lot more than I had liked our first room, but it wasn't really as weird as I had hoped it would be.  I had wanted a room with all of the strange gadgets, but this room was relatively bland.  Nevertheless, we began unpacking when I wondered what we would do with our luggage the next day.  Typically this type of hotel requires you to check out at 10:00 a.m., so I wondered if we'd have to take our luggage with us when we went sightseeing the following day.  I also wondered if Jillian thought my choice of hotels was weird. "Taking a Bath while Conan O'Brien Visited My College Dorm"    06/14/03 I returned to my dorm to see several girls waiting outside of my room.  Apparently my roommate was the resident assistant and all of the girls wanted to talk to her.  There was a handwritten note left on the door that my roommate had gone to the Hispanic Film Festival and would be back soon.  I informed the other girls that I had just been at that festival, but that I came back after the festival finished.  No one had any idea where my roommate was, so I guess someone went to the front desk to get a key.  A worker walked up to me and handed me a key as she told me that people get locked out all the time.  At that moment I realized that I wasn't locked out because I had my own key to the room with me.  All of the other girls left once I was inside.  I had thought that Belinda was my roommate, but eventually a girl whose name I did not know greeted me and walked into the room.  It became obvious that she lived there, not Belinda.  This girl kind of repulsed me.  She was very pale, had dyed black hair, and was very fat.  The girl left soon after that, although I didn't inquire as to where she had been or where she was going because I really hoped that she would never come back.  I decided to take a bath, however I noticed that the bathtub was full of water and was not draining properly.  I went into the living room and noticed there was another bathtub which was empty, however it was very dirty and I felt afraid to bathe in it.  Finally the girl from the desk came back to help me.  She told me to open the drain on the living room tub and the bathroom tub would drain.  Luckily her suggestion worked and I was able to take a bath in a clean tub.  After my bath I went downstairs and saw Conan O'Brien telling jokes in the common area.  The entire dorm was filled with Christmas decorations and Conan mentioned something about being on a Christmas comedy tour.  Then I noticed that he had snow frozen all over the front of his corduroy pants. "Menthol Light Cigarettes"    06/13/03 I was staying at a house with two girls I didn't know.  They were rebellious type, talking back to the one girl's father when he punished them.  The girl who lived there suggested that we go onto the balcony off her bedroom to smoke.  I felt happy about this opportunity because I had never smoked before but had wanted to.  They offered me menthol light cigarettes.  I smoked at least three cigarettes in a row.  As I was smoking I had a thought about smoking in real life on my own balcony and bonding with the grandfather-type who lives next door to me and smokes on his balcony.  Suddenly my thoughts were interrupted by someone asking me how many cigarettes I had smoked.  I estimated that I had smoked about four.  The person commented that I had smoked too much in one day, so I said I would only smoke one more cigarette for that day.  I lit up my last cigarette.  Smoking was so pleasurable; it felt like the catharsis one feels after crying for a long time.  I noticed that there was no ash from this cigarette and wondered if something was wrong with this cigarette.  The next time I inhaled a large wad of fibers from the filter went into my mouth.  I felt disappointed that my last cigarette was ruined. "Babies and Dudas"    06/12/03 I was an undercover federal agent who was pretending to be Italian.  I looked like I was at least 30 years old and when I looked in the mirror I noticed that my face had the start of fine wrinkles.  As part of my cover I was pretending to be a mother in the mall.  So everywhere I went I was carrying a naked baby with me.  However, I would hardly have passed as the typical mom.  I was dressed in all black and was extremely thin, despite the fact that I supposedly was holding my newborn baby.  I also had no stroller or diaper bag, which should have given me away.  I was trying to find out what type of crimes Italian men were planning in the mall.  As I walked about people kept shouting out "duda".  I was afraid that meant that they doubted that I was really a mother.  I knew if they found out that I was not really a mother that they would kill me and the baby.  I felt so sorry for the baby because it was so little that it must have been born premature.  I realized that I loved that child as if it were my own and realized that I wanted to have children of my own. "Home Improvement/Wedding Seminar"    06/11/03 My mother, brother and I were watching an outdoor Jewish wedding when my mother and I decided to leave to attend a home improvement seminar because the wedding was taking an inordinately long time.  My brother wanted to stay behind to continue watching the wedding.  He told us that he thought it would be rude to leave in the middle, but my mother and I left anyway because it was clear that the wedding was going to last for several hours more.  My mother and I arrived to the home improvement seminar late and had trouble finding two seats together in the crowded hotel ballroom.  My mother suggested that we go upstairs to find seats in the balcony area.  As I was walking to the elevator I realized that we were inside a skyscraper that was a city within itself, which reminded me of Roppongi Hills.  I stepped into a glass elevator and saw that Ursula was already inside along with a man I didn't know.  The elevator was going up many stories and I was terrified due to my fear of heights.  I had only wanted to go to the second floor.  The man made small talk with us about why two young women would be traveling alone.  Based on his suit, flashy watch and arrogant attitude I knew that he thought he was really something special.  I just rolled my eyes because I knew I would be wealthier than he would ever be.

 

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